What is a Have-Do-Have trap and why should I avoid it?
In today’s society there is great emphasis on having and that in order to have you just need to follow certain steps – the Doing.
Put another way – In order to Have just Do (actions) then you will Have.
This process totally ignores who you currently are. Your beliefs, your habits and behaviours, your thinking, and your environment. All of these elements together shape and form who you are today. The question is, will who you are today allow you to Have what you want? Through self observation and of others, the answer to that is NO.
Why not, you may ask. Simple. Who we are today sets the height of the glass ceiling to which we rise. And why a glass ceiling? We can see beyond, but can’t go above as we currently are.
To break through our glass ceiling we must become a new version of ourselves.
OK, this is all very airy fairy, give me an example.
Say you want to have a business that has good clients that pay well and you have a good life style. What do you need to do? There’s a trap here in this question…..What is it?
It is, “what do you need to do.” This is a double edged sword. If you already have a business, but aren’t getting the outcomes you want, doing more of the same won’t get you to where you want to be. You are still the same person, doing the same stuff. Maybe a tweak here and there, but by and large, not much will change.
Why do you always attract the clients that you do? Why do you always have the same problems with payments? The problems with time frames. Always feeling like you’re chasing your tail?
So, what’s the answer?
Who do you need to become in order to do the actions that will bring about your desired outcome?
Not the person you are today. You need to develop new beliefs, habits, environments, and thinking that supports you to do all the activities that will bring you to your goal. The Have. You need to look at the world through different eyes or lenses. See the problems with different insight and perspective.
Many people get stuck on the Have-Do-Have treadmill. Constantly doing, but never really becoming the person they need to be in order to Have.
Step back, what do you need to change about you, the way you look at and see the world, the way you tackle the problems you face. Become the person who matches the outcome that you are seeking. Once you do that, then you will begin to have the things you desire.
The above example can be related to any other desire. Relationships, career, sports, music.
They all require you to change you to reflect the outcome that you desire. Just doing more things will not always bring about the Have that you desire.
until next time
metta
Garth
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